When God Is Rolling Her Eyes
So what? Life gets too painful at times. Does it mean that the whole universe hates you?
Most people turn their thoughts to spirituality exclusively in their very low moments. It’d be naïve to assume, however, that they search and examine their own soul. Instead, they address their questions to ‘someone’ or ‘something’ out there ‘somewhere’.
They ask: Why me? Why me again?
They want to know why they have been chosen as recipients for misery and despair. They demand answers. They hope for mercy. And sometimes, even the staunchest atheists fall to their knees to negotiate and plead for a better deal.
Human beings are fabulously funny. When we prosper, we take all the credit ourselves. When we’re down, we tend to blame anyone close and far. And when there’s no one else left to blame, we seek God.
We remind Her of all the good things we’ve done. We list our deeds of love and service to others. We insist that we deserve better!
But what if She already knows all that?
And what if She doesn’t give a sh*t whether you are or are not her “official” devotee?
Maybe God knows very well that She’s created a somewhat limited species. Individuals with marvelous intellect who are so busy praising their ability to think that they forget to feel. Men and women who are able to describe even the smallest of cells in the human body but fail to understand their own heart.
She probably suspected that there would be many to dispute Her presence. She anticipated that they would quarrel, fight, and kill each other to sell their unique image of the Creator.
when God created love He didn’t help most
when God created dogs He didn’t help dogs
when God created plants that was average
when God created hate we had a standard utility
when God created me He created me
when God created the monkey He was asleep
when He created the giraffe He was drunk
when He created narcotics He was high
and when He created suicide He was low
〜 Charles Bukowski
She made people so that they could excel in science. She expected they would use it for innovation and self-destruction as well.
She made them curious.
Always looking for the meaning of their existence.
Most often in the utterly wrong places.
Big religions of the world tell you that you need to pray for God to bestow Her love on you. You need to demonstrate your appreciation of the Divine in one way or another, so She will see you and forgive you.
I believe if we’re about to pray, it’s not to tell God, “Look, I’ve just dedicated 5 minutes of my time to beg you nicely for your attention. Will you listen?” but simply to connect with Her in the first place.
Or Him. Or Nature. Universe. The Higher Good. Whatever it is that is giving birth to beautiful and ugly things alike; whatever it is that is monitoring and keeping order in this world.
Whether you pray, meditate, or just sit still and breathe, what you’re looking for is connection. Connection with yourself, with others, with what is beyond all of us.
Connection is not about asking for something. It’s about listening.
It’s for you to realize that you’re a part of something that makes sense even though it feels the complete opposite most of the time. To understand that everything that is happening around you and to you has a reason, even if it hurts unbearably now and then.
It’s about showing respect for the creative energy, force, and intelligence we’re all part of.
Sometimes, our life seems to suck profoundly. We fail at whatever we touch. Our relationships break before they get any chance to flourish. Our body is ill, our mind exhausted.
What have we done to be punished like this?
Maybe, just maybe, God has no interest in punishing us individually. Maybe She’s way too smart for that. In the end, there are more than 7 billion people on the Blue Planet.
It could be that She’s put an automatic system of checks and balances in place, so that we learn to act better with every good and bad experience all along from our birth until our death.
Because if you are able to help yourself, She will have much less work assisting you every single time you get into trouble.
So what to do when things don’t go as planned, to say the least?
To begin with, cultivate your thoughts, because your own spirit cannot awaken if your mind is a messy place where any futile idea and toxic judgment can plant its seed.
Only when your mind is calm and quiet, can you start hearing the voice from within you that connects you to all of the existence.
Secondly, accept the fact that only you are responsible for dealing with the circumstances you live in. If they are painful and if they have been that way for too, too long, it means that you have not been listening up until now.
If you end up in destructive relationships all over again, it’s because you’ve yet to learn the fundamental lesson about yourself. Unhealthy attracts unhealthy. Healthy attracts healthy.
Or if you’ve developed nasty chronic diseases, it’s because you’ve failed to decipher what your body is trying to tell you about your decisions and choices. And it will keep broadcasting its message no matter what, unless you finally get it.
Unpleasant things are happening to us so that we can outgrow ourselves.
Someone will never listen, hence never progresses. Then they will spend their whole life in pain.
Another will connect with themselves and with what is above and ask: “What is this all telling me? What am I supposed to learn?”
And then, when the lesson is learned, the bad circumstance will pass.
When you blame God, She’s laughing. When you never learn, She’s rolling Her eyes. When you’re not willing to help yourself, I guess She just feels sorry.
Art by Mia Ohki
If you like my writing, you'd love my book :)